Tuesday, December 16, 2014

Oh, Winter, You're Not so Bad.

Unless you live someplace warm, you’re probably well aware that last winter was a nightmare. It sucked. And I complained. A lot. And so did you. Admit it.

I think all that complaining was a mistake. Not that it didn’t relieve some stress and give me a reason to shake my nearly always clenched winter fists, but it also made me a bit…uhm, grumpy. It might even have made the winter longer. 

This year I’m trying a different tactic. One taught to me by an actual cold-weather fan. Yes, Virginia, they exist. And now I'm one of them. I'm going to enjoy this winter. All of it. The snow. The freezing rain. The chattering teeth. Yep, this cold weather thing is going to whiz by like a cryogenic sleep! 

Right now, some of you cold-weather staters are thinking I’ve lost my mind. You're probably thinking, "Diana, the only thing to do in winter is keep your head down, your mind on warmer times, and your butt cheeks clenched."

Okay, so yeah, normally I'd agree with you. But this is a new me. A new snow loving, long john wearing me. So the other day I drove to my soon-to-be home. See photo.
It’s obviously not finished yet. It doesn’t have heat. Or electricity. Or a toilet. Unless, you count that plastic, portable outhouse. I don’t. I’m not even going to look in there. Shudder.

It was pretty cold at the soon-to-be, but for the first time in a long time, okay, ever, I enjoyed the chill. I made myself look at the different hues of gray in the sky. Seriously, it had never before occurred to me that there would be anything to like about a gray sky. But it was so lovely. And at moments pieces of blue sky could be seen underneath the gray, and it was like the gray was just a soft blanket over the blue. Aw. Winter. You're not so bad. You're like a fat cat that shits on my goose down blanket, because you have no other way of reminding me to change the litter in your liter box. Uh, no. Wait. That doesn't work. Sorry. A little insight into my past week. 

But, hey, that's the crappy indoor stuff. Outside is crisp clean air that is so happy to see me it greets my every breath with a filmy white puff of love. Thanks, cold air. I didn't realize how much you cared.

I’m not going to get poetic. But, it was fun to sit out on my incomplete deck, watch a family of turkeys waddle by, and just take it all in. Heck, at one point I danced all by myself. 

It looked sort of like this…

Okay. It looked nothing like that. Except for the French. I was singing French. No. Sorry. I wasn’t. This whole blog post has become a slippery slope of deceit. Back to enjoying winter.

I danced all by myself. Like a cold weather lunatic. Like one of those speedo wearing YOLO enthusiasts that take a dip in the frigid waters off the Atlantic every New Year's. (I actually know someone who does this.)

So it turns out winter doesn’t totally suck. It's my mindset that sucks. I don't need to be warm. I just need to be active. In the cold. It can happen. I actually prefer to run in colder weather vs. hotter weather. I don’t get a headache! And I feel so tough.

So, yeah. Winter.

Did I mention the cool gray clouds? And fires, yeah, fires Rock the Casbah. You thought only the Clash did that. Fires and hot chocolate and soft blankets and laughing as you race your husband to the bathroom, because you both dragged your sorry butts out of the warm bed at the same time, and now neither of you wants to stand there shivering while the other one pees first. 

This winter is going to rock! I love the cold! Love it!

I’m going to be just like the Snow Miser. Happy and gaudy and dancing. But, you know, I’m going to wear pants. And I won’t ever just let snot icicles form on my nose. Gross. So, I'm going to be Snow Miser but with some important standards. Care to join me, kids? If so, make sure to keep me updated on all the exciting ways you are enjoying your winter! 

Keep an eye out for more of my winer exploits. Hint: This year I won't be going to Costa Rica!


  1. Yay! You've finally come to love glorious winter! Writing on a cold and gray day has no peer. Think about it--when the sky is blue and the air the perfect temperature, do you really want to be sitting at your desk looking out a window? Or do you want to be doing something in it. So bring on the gray days! Wind, rain, snow! When you can look out your window and appreciate the beauty, sip your hot cocoa and say, "I'm glad I have a house! Poor birds."

    But being out in it can be a joy, as you've seen. That "stings your nose" cold, the breath that chills through you as your body warms it to less than torturous temperature. The perfect shade of Prussian blue edging those silver-white clouds. Gads the beauty. Blue, summer skies have nothing on the (I can't do it...I was going to make a 50 shades of gray reference...oh, wait...I just did it there. Ugh.) gorgeous gray skies of winter.

    1. Oh, Terri-Lynne, you're such an inspiration!! What a beautiful scene you've painted. Yep. I'm a convert. No more complaining! About winter. I leave other things open for disdain. Like shopping at malls at Christmas time.