So, yesterday, I was attempting this yoga DVD and the instructor was instructing the class in how to do a headstand. No wall here kids. You either get your ass to balance or you fall on it. Needless to say, the idea of balancing all of my girth on my spindly, often injured neck, didn't appeal to me. I was trying it anyway. I was trying it because I'm stubborn that way, and because I was worried that I was worried. I know, it takes a minute to get it. I was worried that I had become so fearful that I had forgotten how to play, to enjoy myself while trying new things. So I tried to stand on my head.
Okay, so now I'm not playing at all. I'm gritting my teeth, flinging my legs up, and cursing. So this isn't exactly fun, but I didn't care. After all, I had seen quite a few video game sessions that involved gritted teeth and cursing.
Deciding that I needed help to get my flagging ass into a vertical position, I called my fourteen-year-old son. He was not pleased when I told him I needed him to grab my legs, so that I can stand on my head. But he's a good kid. He stood where I told him and waited as I flung my legs at him. And when my legs did spaztastically fling in his direction, what did he do? He jumped out of the way. I flipped over and fell on my ass. We both burst into laughter.
He dropped to the ground laughing. We communicated with giggles punctuating our sentences.
"You fell," he said, laughing.
"You let me fall," I said, laughing.
"I wasn't sure what to do." Him. More laughing. "Are you okay?"
Me, laughing harder. "Yeah."
And I was. Because playing, like we did it as kids, isn't about the perfect headstand or the fastest mile time or some other measure of what you're achieving while you're "having fun." It's about laughing, enjoying whatever you're trying to do no matter the results. So the next time you're attempting to play too seriously, remember to cut yourself a break, measure yourself by how much you laugh, how many giggles burst from your mouth along with your spittle, and how many times you fall on your ass in a spaztastic lump. And if you need a laugh today, here's a video to help.